An "In-between" advocate

I've always been the type to make things happen in my life. I wanted to move out of state...so I did.    I picked up and went. No job, no source of income, no real plan. I just went and figured it out. I knew I wanted a boxer as my side kick. I would visit shelters in the area twice a week to see the new dogs brought it. I would check website after website, but not just any dog would do. I would know when I found "the one". After 6 months of searching...I found her. She was in PA, scared, mistreated and alone. She was mine. I drove hours there and back to get her, and I knew upon meeting her, I found my soul mate named Anna. I wanted to meet my husband, and no other jafaffs were cutting it...so I went to an online dating site and made a profile. I was the one to contact him. What was I gonna do, sit around and wait for my doorbell to ring with prince charming on the other side of the door? Highly unlikely, so I went looking. (we all know how awesome that turned out for me) I wanted a career change, so I went back to school at 33. Most people would be scared to do it so late in life, but not me. I now have another degree. So when it came to making a baby, and the old fashioned way just wasn't working, I sought help. I passed over my OBGYN and went right to a fertility specialist. I had a need..a need so strong, that I was going to seek help in any way I can. Fertility assistance isn't cheap. I would sell things, cut back on certain things, and go without, just to afford the costly treatments.
And now I'm in this situation. I've been knocked down, bruised & broken, but more knowledgeable than before. More prepared than before. Unfortunately, more jaded than before. If  I've gone after everything  I want my entire life, why the hell wouldn't I fight tooth and nail to get the one thing I desire more than anything? I thought you get pregnant and you have a baby. That's it. But truth be told, there is a whole in-between to that. Not many people know about, and hardly ever discuss it. Babies die in the in-between. I am now educated about that scary in-betweens. Knowledge is power. My need to be a Mother far out weighs the fears of pregnancy I have. With this power I have organized a team of doctors in my corner to include my fertility specialist, my OBGYN and now a high risk maternal fetal medicine doctor, all to monitor me closely with a fine tooth comb. I will be seen by one of those doctors once a week. Even if it's just to hear the heartbeat. It may be over kill, but you NEED to be your own advocate. This isn't their life story...it's mine. This CANT happen again. Not to me. I wont recover.You need to learn as much as you can to protect yourself and your body. Living in the "in-between" in no place you want to be...and I swear to God that I'm going to give it MY BEST effort to NEVER be in between again.