It's been a year

It's been a year. A year since the worst day of my life. A whole year since you left us. My life changed that day and it's about to change again. You did exactly what angels are supposed to do. Protect and provide. You've hand picked and protected our rainbow. I still cry everyday. A year isn't long enough to stop the tears, just like a lifetime isn't long enough to mend a heart.When I sit in your sister's nursery, I think about how you should have had a nursery. As I stack her books, I think about all the books I never got a chance to read to you. But what I can do for you, is build you a memorial garden. I don't know what the weather was last September 22nd because it was pitch black to me. This September 22nd is going to be filled with sunshine as I create this garden with love and memories. I'll watch it grow& flourish , as I should be watching you do. Happy 1st birthday/angelversary buddy.

So what did I do differently this time?
First, I read, read, read all I could about baby loss, and different doctors theory's on how to prevent subsequent losses. I learned that doctors treat based on a "within normal limits" approach. Well, any BLM will tell you...our situation isn't normal, and we certainly don't want to move forward being treated as such.
So I designed my own prenatal treatment care plan based on everything I read and persuaded both my OB and Perinatal (high risk) to agree. Truth be told, they both thought my treatment approach was over the top, but I didn't care. Especially if "over the top" gets me a healthy baby.
My plan: See my OB bi-weekly for cervical swabs for infection and testing for UTI's.
Weekly visits to my perinatal for a cervical length scan and ultrasound to measure amniotic fluid, heart rate and growth. Watching my baby grow was the highlight of my week. I also received weekly progesterone shots to calm my uterus.  I took a daily supplement of prenatal vitamin, Vitamin C, and pro-biotic.
No sex, no swimming, and no baths. I bought a home fetal heart monitor to listen to the baby's heartbeat before I could feel her significantly move on a daily basis. (that was more to keep me sane) I avoided most recreational activities, avoiding walking long distances and stayed off my feet when possible.
I don't know if one particular thing worked, if it was a combination of things or if none of these things mattered. All I do know is....I am waiting for my healthy baby girl to arrive any time now.
God is good and miracles DO happen.