You went away. How dare you.
It's been 11 weeks and 2 days..I am in just as much pain. I'm not ok. I was torn down within minutes and it's going to be a work in progress to build back up again. Especially since Joe and I are "trying" again to build a family. I struggle with trying again in fear that it = moving on. Replacing. That is NOT the case. This process is all so overwhelming. Shots daily, blood and ultrasound every 2 days. The physical headaches, the disappointments, all to love a child. Please God..don't do this to me again. I won't survive it. That will be the end of me. I'm a fighter, I'm trying my hardest, but it's taking every ounce of energy I can muster up..to progress. I keep seeing quotes about if God put the dream in your heart, he'll make that dream come true. I'm hanging by a thread.
I talk to the tiny urn that contains my baby's ashes every morning. It's almost time for you to be here...but instead, you reside on my dresser. How dare you. I miss you. I'll never be over you.
Kristina please stay strong I know it is so hard to do and easier said then done. I cried reading this. Please dont let depression get you please stay strong think positive. You will never replace that baby never... Having another child will never replace your 1st baby.. just build on the family you have this includes your lost baby.. so sorry for your pain and heartbreak....
ReplyDeleteHugs!! I feel ya girly. It doesn't get easier, and I don't think the pain is ever going to go away, even if we go on to have babies. I know without a doubt you WILL have a baby to hold in your arms someday. I pray that Baby Mamott and Baby Sellers sprinkle both of us with their baby dust. Love you!!
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